Archive for May, 2011

check this out

Posted: May 19, 2011 in Uncategorized
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I just bought this book at a used book store and it was wonderful. I wasn’t sure what to expect when I saw it, not a lot of modern literature impresses me much. But this was full of insightful and clever stories. It is I was Told There’d Be Cake by Sloane Crosley. I really enjoyed every essay. It’s a nice read, not burdened by ostentatious vocabulary (which I realize is an ostentatious word within itself) and just flows brilliantly. It gave me some hope for the current generation of writers. I lost my hope when half of my high school graduating class preferred the work of Stephen King to Joyce or Dickens.

But this, this is great. Go buy it right now. Do it.

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I try, I really do, but I expect the same effort from someone I take out.

Last night I took out this girl I met at a diner near the office, Melissa. She was nice, cute, funny, but on our date she seemed so aloof. When we first spoke at the diner I told her I was a writer and she responded with telling me how much she loved literature. She went on to say she very much enjoyed the work of Jane Austen and the Brontes. Turns out she didn’t read any of them, just saw any film based on one of their books. I realized this when she misquoted Austen as we spoke about Pride and Prejudice. The line she repeated was from the movie alone. I didn’t want to point it out, but I made a mental note.

After she asked me what I liked I sort of rambled for awhile, but she wasn’t even listening. Her eyes wandered and she had nothing to add.

Are my standards too high? Is it too much for me to expect someone to share the same interests as me? She just didn’t care. I can appreciate liking different things, but at least listen when someone is telling you about theirs. I listened to her inaccurately talk about Austen and tell me all about how much fun surfing is (I’ve never tried), but she couldn’t bother to listen to me. The last nail in the coffin was when she told me how much she loved my articles and that she read every single one. Really? You like the dribble I make no effort on to produce for the masses in this town? I just expressed my gratitude and the date eventually came to a pleasant end. The kiss was nice though, I did crave some intimacy. I just wish it was enough to overlook the other flaws of the date.

I want companionship, not just another sexual partner. I need to cast out a larger net. I’m too annoyed to be eloquent right now.

I was afraid I might be one of those people who rarely updates their online journals. I hate when I “follow” someone and they stop updating or update very infrequently. Sadly, I got bogged down with assignments, all unimpressive busy work, mind you. And, a more embarrassing excuse, I recently acquired Fallout: New Vegas. Normally I don’t get addicted to video games, I play them more as an outlet for aggression or simply to relax. But this game sort of drew me in. I haven’t played any of the other games in the Fallout series, but I fear those might effect me in the same way.

I think the idea that I have almost more control in the game than I do in life has created this surrogate. In the game I can choose to be good or bad with almost no consequences either way. Sure, gameplay and interactions within the game based on the type of character I have, but I can do anything. The game is dark, I’ll give you that, but there is still something so uplifting about it.

Plus, after hours of having to listen to different people going on and on about their new bakery opening or heroic dog, I can get on the PS3 and shoot some ghouls or a bunch of slavers from Caesar’s Legion. Just barrel through shooting everyone, but go back to my previous save point and reset. Just a perfect way to bring down my stress level.

So you have Bethesda to thank for my distraction and lack of updates.

But I promise I will never resort to Grand Theft Auto, I might as well become a frat bro if I start playing that. I just can’t get into driving around and hitting things, creating cop chases, what have you. It’s nonsensical.